bus

Please don't judge me The only reason I'm still with you is cause I can't afford our bills on my own. Hell you still owe for the gas and electricity at the old place, yet you won't discuss it with me. Thanks for picking up some of the responsibility. I'm not unhappy with you, just ambivalent, so I ...

I think I'm about to make the wrong decision that I'm gonna regret. I hope to goodness my gut feeling isn't going to be proved right.

You fucking idiot. If you can afford to borrow money from me this week and pay it back on payday, why can't you not borrow money and pay me back for some of the £500 you already owe me?! I'm fed up of you borrowing my money and making an already tight financial situation worse. You're 27, take some ...

I read post-secret every week without fail. I find it interesting, but very rarely associate with it. This week I could have written 2 of the post cards that are posted. It's actually a bit surreal.

Sh*****t. What if he's done as he said. Found out and upped sticks and gone, which is why he's not answering. Logically he's asleep or not got his phone on him. But *paranoid* I shouldn't have gone out on Saturday. F*ck.

So fed up of my stupid f*ckwit boss and landlord. And also sad at the memories. Of a person who died too young. And of happy, sunnier times. I'm scared when my best friend comes back, she won't like me because I think I've changed. Randomly I'd like to hurt myself or od, even tho' I feel ok today a...

Maybe slight ED/SU triggs. I feel like I really don't belong. Anywhere. I am healthy and fine. But I want something to be wrong with me. I've lost weight, now I'm eating like I'll never see food again. If I'm not careful it will all go back. And I don't want that, I don't. I want to be thin. Thinne...

B: Why the fuck should it always fall on me to tidy up and clean? How hard is it to open your eyes, see it's clean, and say, use a plate instead of the counter to make your sandwhich on. Thus no mess. Or how to operate a washing maachine. Or how to work the vacuum. Cause you don't seem to care. I lo...

Can some-one please lock my place for me? The link is in my siggy. Thanks

[PS, I will proably want it unlocking in the future, but for now I don't wnant to be able to access it, so I hope it won't be a problem to ask that- if so, just leave it ]

...like tonight I don't give a damn and I just want to show my inside hurt on the outside and cut. Lots. The only reason I'm not is cause I don't want to upset my boyfriend...but I want to and can't cope with being ok anymore.

I just hope tonight you will give me the time to listen to me & try to understand where I am coming from. Because I think I will break if it goes on like this much longer. And I don't particularly want that to happen. ----------------- You were effing useless this morning- honestly, if I have gloves...

B: You think I'm a bratty little madam who's snobby do you? Ok, so here's the truth. L is a skank. Your whole family are dirty and disgusting, have they never heard of bleach or a vacuum cleaner? Your sister has 2 small children, by different dads, both of whom by your accounts are supposed to be tw...

I want to hurt myself again. I won't, cause I don't anymore, the anger isn't strong enough to do it, but the sadness is there and the loneliness, never mind the numbness.

I wish you'd leave me so I don't have to wonder about leaving you. If you could just pull your weight, you're off all fucking day but it never occurs to you to just push the vacuum around or change the bedding or do some washing of your own accord. I do it when I get home from work, when you grumble...

That post was one of my most honest ones ever, cause I was having to be honest with myself and my feelings too.

When you say to me I'm perfect [for you], you wouldn't change a bit of me etc, I can't help but not be able to honestly agree. You're perfect in lots of ways apart from you're not a Christian. But that's hypocritical cause I'm not, I don't go to church or have an active relationship with Him anymor...

Alone. Isolated. I want to talk. But there is nothing. And there is no-one. I've lost my 3 best friends. My boyfriend and me are arguing constantly. So 5 days before we move in together I'm contemplating saying sorry and goodbye. Even though it will break me. I feel stressed. Exhausted. Under press...

...like I don't want to. If it had been a bad batch of pills the other night and I had died I would have died happy. Happy because I'm with you, happy because I was high, happy because I can escape the fact my life is in tatters, I've lost my friends, I'm losing the day to day battle of keeping goin...