bus

I am 21 fucking years old. I am married I have a son. You can't tell me what to do, you can't go behind my back and make plans, you can't sigh and put on dramatic airs because I don't want to follow your piss poor advice. If you'd wanted to have some influence on my life choices, you might have trie...

fire eye'd boy wrote:confused.
overly energetic.
anxious.
i want a cigarette.
i just had a cigarette.
i should quit smoking.
no, fuck that.
like shit.
like procrastination is masturbation without the positive side.

Ha, I was going to write something like that, but you wrote it for me.

Thanks dude.

Sometimes, when I'm sitting up in bed awake in the middle of the night panicking about my stomach... or my arms... or how tall I am... When my BDD gets really bad... I think about how easy it would be to just take whatever pain killers and left over Xanax I have in one of the drawers somewhere in th...

I'm worried about you.
Stop loosing weight.
I can tell you know.

I'm happy.

I've never been formally diagnosed with it, but it's been highly suggested that I have it.

when it gets really bad I have no way of deal with it except freezing in one spot and freaking out for awhile.

so I'm not much help, but I know how it feels.

It's all good, just wanted to make sure.

and you know so people wouldn't just think I was being lazy.

I still cannot acess it.
I registered, I got the email, but I still haven't been approved.

Dear Model in sketching class. If you don't stop moving, I will throw my sketchpad at your head. You are there to be still, please do it. Dear advisor. Guess what? I know it's almost december, I also know tha tI haven't thought of a final project, I know that. STOP REMINDING ME. Dear Hunter. You're ...

We're not spending christmas with you

My wife, because I know she loves me as much as I love her and that's ridiculous.

Our son, because... well that goes without saying. He's my life.

My wife says that Psalms to herself when she's having a hard time.

for the first time in my life I'm not underweight

it fucking terrifies me.

After three fucking years in Art School, I'm pretty sure I know what green is. I'm pretty sure that I spent about ten minutes mixing that shade, and several others before picking the one that was put in my painting. Emailing me and telling me that you don't think it's the right shade won't make me r...

I changed a diaper and it actually looks like a diaper... not some failed kindergarten art project.

I made supper and didn't make the house explode

I played piano for two hours.

I have no creativity left. Nothing I come up with makes my advisor think I'm working ahrd enough.

Instead of sketching the model in class, I sketched the window behind her.

I.Can't.Do.This.

I'm so anxious about not doing well that the thought of never going back is quite appealing.

Hunter. I'm not going to lie dude, I have no idea what the fuck I'm doing. I have no model to look back on... I don't really know how to throw a baseball or how to make a spice rack out of wood. I won't be wearing polo shirts and all your teachers and all your friends and everyone will always see m...

Even though I know I wouldn't be here if it weren't for you.

I don't have one good memory from those two years.

thanks,

I've actually been diagnosed with BDD, so I understand... IT takes a lot of work to start to think that the reason you think you're ugly is because what you see in the mirror is ugly to you because you have BDD. It's confusing as hell, and it's harsh to deal with. And I wis I could say something mor...