bus

sometimes things that seem to be so senseless.... end up helping more than we'd have thought. if even they do nothing more than waste time for a bit...

so snap out of it so you're bored... do something... even if you don't particularly want to do something... just do 'something'. if you're looking for something to do it might as well be something non-si.

--fuzzy cat-in-the-hat pants
--kitties
--fishies
--fast library computers

--winter hats
--looking forward to babysitting brothers laptop
--little green plastic aliens

getting food during class
making it through a schoolday without missing class even though you really didn't want to go

--mentioning that you're hungry & having a classmate offer you food
--classmates noticing your existence
--fuzzy sweaters
--colorful pens
--choir class

fuzzy sweaters

because ive been free for so long it makes me scared to go to the people who wouldve helped me before. --not sure if it's the same kinda thing for you... for me... i get to thinking that if i'm not si'ing/on the verge of si'ing... then i must be fine. then i shouldn't ask. etcetc. yet really... pers...

he does know i use to self harm, but i feel like i cant tell him now, i feel im letting him down too much and am attention seeking by texting him wanting help --what about leaving out the urge to self-harm... & stick with what you said earlier in your post... '*this* is the situation with my housema...

--cookies
--coffee
--clean sheets
--nice smelling soap

cats
coffee
music

*nods* sounds good

any thoughts about what to do differently if/when you're feeling like that again?

what could you do to work towards feeling more calm... or calmer more frequently... besides si?

--having a fairly good day at school
--getting a reply to an email after sending it again... & not feeling so guilty for sending it the second time now

# what will you try before you resort to self-harm if you're in that situation again? list three specific things you will commit to trying. i dont know if anythings worth trying?????? --then what's the point of answering the questions? what are you hoping to get from doing that? i feel at a loss in ...

ice cream
fall leaves

good
hope things go well tomorrow & that you get across what you're wanting to

fuzzy sweaters
brothers that buy you ice cream because they know you're unhappy
snuggly cats

how about just telling him that? 'i'd like to discuss this until *i* feel more ok about things. i'm scaring myself & i'm feeling like you're not hearing that. i know i got through the urge. i'd still like to talk about it though' saving meds is dangerous... & definitely doesn't help urges any. but i...