bus

I'm not feeling as urgy now, after getting home and taking care of some chores, but I still want to just answer some questions. Why do I feel I need to hurt myself? What has brought me to this point? Talking about college issues ... where I should be going, where I am, where I want to be ... that ge...

Forgive my ignorance ... I can't tell which are the reserved avatars ... I hope I haven't taken someone's avatar ... Haven't seen anyone else using it, though, so ...

EDIT: Oh, nevermind, I figured it out. I'm not using a reserved one. Wheeee!

I wish that I could believe him when he says good things about me
I wish that I could stop feeling like I betray him by not living up to his image of me
I wish that I could have the courage to either tell people or stop...

drew on my arm with red lipstick ... went to bed.

I was thinking obsessively about SI even though nothing was going wrong or anything. I ended up scratching myself a little (no marks, so doesn't count) and then got myself together and hung out with family.

I was convinced I was going to SI as soon as I got home from some very stressful things, but instead I threw myself into my homework, and I actually got a lot done because of the feverish energy ... now I have a little less to be stressed about. :) I can't really believe it ... but it feels good. :1...