bus

I missed a bit of the sentence out.sorry. :oops: I'm really tired, but I dont want to go to bed cause im not in the right frame of mind for sleep. Im too tired to be on the computer but its occupying me, if i do nothing, and im too scared to talk to my mate, then I know si is all i'll think about. A...

I haven't cut in six months. And I'm so proud of myself for that. But right now my housemate is going through a lot of shit, and I can't help her and that's killing me and making me feel awful. And it just makes me feel worthless. And I live in a house full of people in relationships, and I feel so ...

how will this situation or feeling change if i hurt myself? I'll feel relief. I'll feel relief that I don't have to go on fighting it, I will have done it, the constant fighting is tiring me out and making it impossible to think of anything else. what will hurting myself bring to the situation? what...

Because I went out and bought a punch bag eysterday (a small one but still) and it's now in my room at uni and i can just kick the s*** out of it!

Because I know there's people who believe in me, and I know when i do it I'm not just hurting me, I'm hurting them too. And as much as I wanna hurt myself I don't wanna put them through it.

And because 6 weeks is the longest I've ever been free, I'm on 3weeks now and I wanna keep going.