bus

pm also sent to

hayleylsl

pm's sent to..

deeanne.
danricketts
deputyjess

:star: screw you.. just screw you.. how could you think that way? how could you even act like this when you had told me numerous times that you knew what it was like.. that you understood where i came from with so many different things.. you destroyed my trust in so many.. i can't trust because of y...

pm sent to imme

:bluestar: going for a walk.. even if its night and in my backyard. :bluestar: music. :bluestar: replaying a conversation between me and my band director in my head... its one where he had just looked at me and was like "be good." and like someone else had said.. I know what he meant by it. :bluesta...

still headachey..
and i feel.. like something i can't describe.. but it's on the tip of my tongue.. i hate that feeling.

At the moment..

Little House - The Fray ... just.. fits.

headachey. on both sides.

then on one hand i am..

kinda upbeat
little happier than before
ready to start fresh


on the other.. i'm

stressed.
frustrated.
just tired of it all.


Argh..

*lays back down on floor*


I can't take it anymore.. I can't take YOU anymore.. I won't do this again.. I will not play these games again.. no.. they hurt last time and that taught me a lesson.. I WONT DEAL WITH YOU LIKE THAT AGAIN!

Music, because it speaks louder than words can.. it can allow someone to hear how I am feeling without me saying a word. My Mentor, and the fact that he's proud of me and always has been.. I'm not a disappointment to him, when I feel like I have been to everyone else. He helps me get through the day...

stressed.
hurt.
worthless.
lonely.
pathetic.
headachy.
bothersome.
a waste.
bad.
like i want to lock myself in a room and stay there.

and for me.. worst of all.. i feel like i want to cry.

*lays down on the floor* *closes eyes tight* *and just screams as loud as possible* ARGH!!!!!!!! WHY?! WHY?! WHY!? WHY THE HELL DO YOU HAVE THIS "POWER" OVER ME TO MAKE ME FEEL THIS WAY?!! HOW THE HELL DID YOU GET THAT ANYWAYS.. AND WHY CAN'T YOU JUST LEAVE IT BE? WHY DO YOU HAVE TO HAVE THE LAST WO...

i hate feeling like my problems arent worth a backwards glace. deep down.. i'm afraid that i am always going to hate myself. i know i act like i'm tough.. but that's just a shell thats around me.. inside i'm weak and defenceles.. I hate hearing your voice in my head either telling me that i'm an at...

I'm proud of myself because I actually sat down and did part of my English homework.. now if I could finish my homework.. I'd be damned proud of myself.. [I hate my english homework.]

** there may be a little SI in this I don't know yet. ....* :grnstar: I love you.. you are the person I have always needed, and I'm going to miss you so much.. I want you to know that you're always going to hold a special place in my heart. You can read me better than anyone I have ever known... and...

For the most part.. I have just become inactive with the entire board.. life got really busy, and I was never around.. I agree with what others have said about not being sure what to say in the pm.. mainly I'd jump in their first post and bring in my sarcastic self for a laugh or two, [plus lots of ...

worthless.
sucky.
like i am nothing.
a nobody.
lonely.

Good Job pointless.

I'm proud of myself because today marks 4 wks smokefree!

like hell.
urgy.
hurt.
like my heads going to split.
unwanted.
unneeded.
unloved.

Really Happy.
Really Giddy.
All out good mood,
and I'm liking it!