bus

I wish I could make it August again.. and do band camp again.. and football season.. and then get my Districts stuff again.. and play the concert with you.. and go to Districts [but this time know better, and do better].. and change all the mistakes I had.. well not all of them.. the ones were I did...

reflective..
worried.
wondering.
little scared.
hoping.
wanting to be selfish..
wishing.

i feel mixed at the moment.

shitty.
physically ill.
stressed.
worried.
doubting.
scared.
hating.
stressed.

not awake.
dreading practice.
wanting to go back to bed.

Songs Without Words, second movement, Reflective - Dan Welcher.

I know. I'm a band geek. Yay for instrumental music.

scared.
unwanted.
alone.
urgy.
unloved.
paranoid.

and stressed to hell about districts.

sleepy.. not wanting to get up and go to school in 10 minutes..

I am getting to a point.. where I just don't want to even try anymore.. you're all that I am holding onto.. but you leave soon.. and damn I am afraid I am going to crash and burn after it.. Yet.. I am afraid of doing that on one hand... and on the other.. I just don't give a damn.. I am afraid I am...

like shit now.

http://buslist.org/phpBB/images/smiles/blstar.gif I want to tell you everything.. I'm just so damned scared too.. I'm afraid you'll think I'm attention seeking.. and I'm so scared of losing you.. I am losing you kinda.. but I don't want it to be that you won't speak or email me.. it's bad enough th...

I'm proud of myself because I wanted to punch a kid in my class in the face.. and instead I worked on my glider for drafting class..

:bluestar: My Kittie cats. :bluestar: Music. :bluestar: just hanging out in the bandroom at school. :bluestar: my pajamas.. i love being in pajamas. :bluestar: my band hoodie.. its really nice.. :bluestar: my little cousin Kendall..she's adorable.. and my mini me.. :bluestar: Coffee. Coffee keeps Da...

I hate Mondays! They are evil.. and ARGH!

blah.. but better than earlier today..
i hate mondays.

i agree full heartedly with what Sarah said.. Well said Sarah!