bus

Before: [*] how will this situation or feeling change if i hurt myself? For a while, I'll feel relaxed [*] what will hurting myself bring to the situation? what will it take away from the situation? It will bring a short lived relief from these antsy frustrated feelings. It will take away over a yea...

Thanks! I'm doing a lot better now!

Hugs,
Wendy

Thanks Notmardy,

I'm still all urgy -- very frustrating. I just did enough to feel stupid and blow my time but not enough to relieve anything.

Wendy

Have you taken care of your physical wounds? if not, go do that now. we'll wait. Yes What had happened just before? I handled a situation with my daughter defying me very badly. What were you thinking and feeling? I was feeling frustrated, angry and was probably looking for an excuse anyway. Why di...

Hi, Coloring and sleeping are both good. I always feel the most urges when I'm tired. Do you have anyone in real life that you can talk to about your feelings? Have you tried journaling -- writing your feelings down longhand. Those are things that have sometimes helped me. I'm glad you posted here -...

Hey Sadgirl, I wasn't trying to should on you. I SI'd myself this past week and didn't even post on Before and After, because I felt I wasn't even commited enough to quitting. I know all about being hard on yourself. I'm glad you have a therapist and that you share your posts from BUS. I do the same...

Stellaria, I don't have answers for you, but I can relate to what you're saying. I also see you struggling very hard to take good care of yourself despite your urges and pain and I think that is really terrific. I hope you give yourself credit for that. I just read over your last three postings and ...

Hi Terri, Things really sound difficult now. I know seeing your kids hurt is so hard and unfortunately you can't control all those things that would hurt them. I'm glad you had a talk with your son. If the medication needs adjusting, I would encourage you to contact your doctor sooner. My understand...

sadgirl2 wrote:Thanks Wendy,

I know your right. I have been working on it. I just need to work a little harder....

Yeah ... me too!

Susie, I like the coloring idea -- you could even color your beach place! I've found that when I can make myself exercise (not always successful there) I never SI afterwards. I have anxiety issues too. Exercise goes a long way toward working that out of the system. I'm glad you posted here. I found ...

Hi Terry, I've been married 18 years and know how the controling stuff can add up quickly. Something you wrote: I guess I really needed some alone time. I had several things come up through out the day where I did what someone else wanted me to do when I really didn't want to do it. reminded me of t...

Hey I'm sorry things are so hard. It's especially rough when your mom treats you with disrespect. The going cold Turkey sounds really hard too. I understand how it feels to not even want to try to fight it or to call for help. It means you're in a lot of pain -- not that you're bad. It's normal to w...

Well, I messed up 20 days into the new year and broke my New Year's Resolution. I was doing so good too. The weird thing is I don't even know why -- just got real urgy and did it -- nothing serious -- didn't really even help. Still have this lovely headache and don't have that nice afterglow. Have y...

I agree Noel -- I've found the same thing helpful. It's much easier to see the truth about someone else's value and their pain than your own.

Hugs,
Wendy

Hey P, Sweetie, I don't think you're letting anyone down except yourself. Try to drop the criticisms of yourself. I know they get to be a habit but they're just another way on injuring yourself. Punishment isn't going to help you change -- acceptance and love will. A phrase my T taught me that helpe...

Glad to here it -- take care!
Wendy

You don't have to be angry with yourself for agreeing to it. People do some very irresponsible things some times and betray other people's trust in them. I've seen the kind of thing you are talking about and it can be emotionally damaging because the abuse reenactment it is for so many. I'm sorry th...

You're still alive and doing great! (Maybe not feeling great -- I know numb isn't a fun place to be). Rooting for you, Noel!

Hugs,

Wendy

I relate to how you describe your feelings. Mine are pretty much the same both mentally and physically. Learning to read your body is a good thing I think, so you can take healthy action before you get to the place you don't even want an alternative to SI. I'm finding the since I've changed my diet ...

Hate to contradict your therapist, but I don't know that telling your husband every time you SI is such a good thing. I know how hard marriage counseling is -- try to get all the support you can. Do you have a friend you can talk to about this privately?

Hugs,

Wendy