bus

Tomorrow - Avril Lavigne And I wanna believe you When you tell me that it will be ok Ya I try to believe you But I don't When you say that it's gonna be It always turns out to be a different way I try to believe you not today... I don't know how I'll feel Tomorrow, tomorrow I don't know what to say ...

The Before and After thread has helped me today.

I filled out the Before questions, instead of going ahead and just cutting,

And I was able to stop myself from cutting!

I should have known better. I should have left well enough alone. But I felt I needed more help. Now I am getting more help, but I am feeling worse. I know you are trying so hard to help me. You are doing all of the right things. But I don't know you very well, I have trust issues. I had to tell you...

I can't remember most of the abuse. The abuse I can remember is bad enough. But it's strange how I can't remember, how I repressed the memory without even thinking about it. I was supposed to write a story of my life with my abuser for therapy. To help me get better, but I can't, so how am I gonna g...

I can't cry alone. And I really need to now.

tired
worthless
hopeless
hated
angry
abused
used
ripped apart
depressed
triggered
SU
afraid
hurt
hurtful
bad
wanting peace
wanting relief

I'm proud of myself today because of just instead of going ahead and cutting like I wanted to do I came on BUS and went on Before and After, and answered the Before questions, and that helped me to stop wanting to cut for now anyway...

Before: Before You Self-Harm write down the shadow that's hiding behind the urge. look at it. ask yourself: how will this situation or feeling change if i hurt myself? It will take away the strong emotional hateful feelings I have towards myself I am hoping, what will hurting myself bring to the sit...

dresdendoll wrote:
virtual tears are easier to produce than real ones

I agree too!

I'm so sorry Collide! :1hug: My friend's dog is dying from liver disease and she is very sad and cries at times too, but she trys not to cry in front of the dog, she is trying to give the dog the best last years of her life, a happy life right to the end. Just thought you'd like to do that for your ...

Scared
Like I made a mistake
triggered
tired
anxious
foolish
emotional flashbacks are coming

I'm so scared and hurt!

I'm still scared he's out to get me. It's my stupid PTSD..
I feel SU, I can't take it anymore!
I feel like a failure for what my therapist said about me..
I don't know what to do with myself to help myself feel better!!!
And I feel like no one cares!!

I just want to quit everything.

I just want to hide in bed.

I just want to avoid life.

I can't stand how I feel.

I'm terrified he's gonna get me tonight.

I'm proud of you wilson!!

I feel like such a failure, you say I'm a victim, I guess I am. With all my fear and flashbacks and such. But saying that doesn't help me...How does that help me??? I'm trying my best...You push and push and push, you just make things worse...I'm sitting at home terrified....Stupid PTSD...

I'm proud of myself today, because I am going to therapy and group therapy even though I am terrified about going, I am going to push myself to go.

That's true as with everymorning!

This describes my true feelings regarding BUS: