bus

i've finally figured out what i need but i'm never going to get it. i need to be held and touched by the person i'm in love with. too bad he lives three states away. i-i was wrong to tell you those things and now i don't know what to do. i've done more ridiculousness these past couple weeks with you...

sometimes i'm not sure if i want to be si free.

i should probably tell my bf i'm in love with my best friend but i won't because there's no chance of it happening.

i have to pick between gloves or a new haircut. i'm picking the long gloves.

the stars outside my window
the books stacked near my bed
spiders

G-I'm sorry. You know something I wouldn't trust with anybody. Don't abuse it, please. I wish you didn't have feelings for me but I need you as a friend right now. D-You manipulitive, uncaring sob. You really did that? I'm done with you. D-You freaking acted like you cared. Not only did you not care...

Good job.

Because I haven't SIed for over a week even though I've felt really urgy the last few days.

You Could be Happy by Snow Patrol You could be happy and i won't know But you weren't happy the day i watched you go. And all the things that i wish i had not said, Are played in loops till it's madness in my head. Is it too late to remind you how we were? But not our last days of silent screaming b...

i feel frightened and confused and self-loathing

C-I know you love me but I have to move on with my own happiness and that means not depending on you. T-I'm moving on. You'll always be a part of me and I'll always love you but I need to let go. A-We've been good friends for years. I loved you then and I think I love you still but I won't say it. I...

Good job.

I'm proud of myself because I've been happy all day.

Nevermind. I figured it out.

I want to change the name to my place and I can't figure out how. Can someone please explain how?

:microwave: :argggh: :argggh: :argggh: :argggh: :argggh: :argggh: :argggh: :argggh: :argggh: :argggh: :argggh: :argggh: :argggh: :argggh: :argggh: :argggh: :argggh: :argggh: :argggh: :argggh: :argggh: :argggh: :argggh: :argggh: :argggh: :argggh: :argggh: :argggh: :argggh: :argggh: :argggh: :argggh: ...

T-I want my best friend back. I want you back. I love you and I miss you so, so terribly. D-If you love me, care for me, and don't want to let me go then show me. This half state is tearing me apart and I can't do it anymore. F-I loathe you. I want you out of my life. Now. I will never forgive you. ...

I want comfort and acceptance but how can I expect it when all i'm doing is withdrawing into myself?

I feel sick and frustrated and depressed. But I also feel better than I did yesterday.