bus

I am in love with my boyfriend's best friend. I dream about him every night.

I deserve to be put first. If you were a good guy I wouldn't come after videogames, alcohol, and an extra hour of sleep. You should treat me better and you suck for making me feel bad this week. It's your fault for making me hate myself again. I can't stand you and you're an annoying douche.

weak and anxious.
im going to give in soon.

I am: lost, teary, falling deeper and deeper, afraid I'm not: a cheater, a slut, a horrible person, his friend, perfect I feel: cold, hungry, urgey, tired, insane I want: God to help me, answers, to find myself, happiness I need: my T, my boy to hug me, assurance that I'll be okay, a good night's s...

because i cant see my moms tears over me again.
because i dont wanna hurt those closest to me.
because i want to break the habit.
because i hope im strong enough to find a better way.

i wish i still had his arms to cry in.
his voice to listen to.
his everything to dry my tears.
:1cries::1cries::1cries::1cries::1cries::1cries::1cries: