bus

I couldn't cry today, even though my eyes were welling up, and I was listening to the song I love and makes me think of my (now ex) beautiful girlfriend. And I couldn't cry. I just can't. I need to, but it just doesn't happen =c I just seem to hollow out and seem spaced instead....

everything and nothing =[

fed up
bored
fat
disgusting
unworthy
loved

happy because I bought a canvas and a sketch pad and M's going to lend me some paints and I FINALLY had that fag I was craving....

...and a bit naughty because I'm going to buy some more ><

Good, and a bit excited, because I'm going into town to buy paints and canvases.

not hungry for the dinner I'm making. I don't want to eat it. I want to throw it away and be thin. But I can't. I shouldn't. I have to be healthy.

Thanks Zazie, thanks Amy. I have no energy to really reply right now, but I posted in my place earlier about my sesh today with my T... Saw my T today. We actually spoke about my ED for the first time in a while. I told her about my imminent relapse, and she said that she didn't want to force me to ...

how will this situation or feeling change if i hurt myself? It'll just make things worse for me, make my health deteriorate, my mood terribly worse and will affect my loved ones... what will hurting myself bring to the situation? what will it take away from the situation? It'll bring my ed thoughts ...

I went to school, even though I really didn't want to.

And
Duality - Slipknot


I push my fingers into my eyes
It's the only thing that slowly stops the ache
But it's made of all the thing I am today
Jesus, it never ends, it works it's way inside
If the pain goes on,
I'm not gonna make it...

Courage- Superchick I told another lie today And I got through this day No one saw through my games I know the right words to say Like "I don't feel well" "I ate before I came" Then someone tells me how good I look and for a moment For a moment I am happy But when I'm alone No one hears me cry I nee...

5 - FOR F*K'S SAKE! I want to go to it, and you said I could. FFS WHY ARE YOU COMPLAINING NOW?

4 - ...did any of you even notice? ....did anyone even care?

1 - Someone please tell me what's going to happen to him? 2 - I love you. I know I say this all the time, but it's true. And I don't want us to end up hurting each other through doing this anymore...I'm scared you'll give up on me... 3 - I worry about you. I don't want you to end up this way. I'm so...

These are so cute! *steals*

fat
painful
sick
tired
achey
so generally not good

sick
fat
thin
hungry
I want foooooooood

I wanted to sleep instead......

I went to my exam, and I am going to my art lesson.

Name: Reine will do =] Are you currently trying to stop or reduce SI: I dn't know anymore =[ I haven't consciously, but it IS getting less.... If so what is your motivation: I want to be happy, thank you... Favorite coping skills: Sleeping XD Busing it... calling M..... crying Coping skills that wor...