bus

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***SI, Lang*** AAAAARGH you FUCKING IDIOT, Lucy! You SWORE to yourself nobody would notice this time! You swore you'd keep it fucking covered, and what did you do? Now she knows, now she's gonna worry, she'll want me to talk to my T about it and know what's going on and everything...fuck, fuck, fuck...

I got a good mark on the one science assignment I've managed to get in this semester.

I got up on stage today dressed like a complete whore for my part in a school play (which really isn't that good) and I wasn't scared, or embarrassed. I just did it.

You pushed me way too far. You had me under your thumb for so long, and you treated me like shit. Now I've had enough, and there's going to be hell to pay. I am going to make you wish you never met me.

I can't stand anybody right now.

Fed up
Antisocial
Anxious
Flat
Bored

ARGH FUCKING HELL I HATE THIS SO MUCH!!!!!!!!!!! I CAN'T TAKE ONE FUCKING MINUTE MORE OF THIS! AISDHGOKAW HLGKJshdLGIUKAHLOIUSGHB;OIAWHE;GAIUHSD;OFUAHGWLEKFHAGLWSEOIGAYPSDIKGJQAKIUHAFLKSJDGFLkhagjahgkljahkjahypokjghlaskdg Fucking hell. :argggh: :argggh: :argggh: :argggh: :argggh: :argggh: :argggh: :...

panicky

I'm so grateful that I have a loving, supportive family. I'm grateful for everything they've provided me with through the years.

I'm grateful I have friends who I can trust.

I'm grateful for the delicious pile of books waiting to be read.

I'm proud because I took my sister shopping today, even though I didn't want to, and I was hot and flustered and tired but I didn't feel like screaming when all the crowds were around me. I coped well.

I hope I'll get better at letting go of hopeless relationships . I hope I'll manage to balance my antisocial mood with still paying attention to my friends. I hope instead of picking a fight with S, I'll be able to tell her calmly what's wrong and then stop hanging around with her. Or just drop it, ...

I feel peaceful, hopeful, happy.

***SI, LANG*** I don't want to hear it. I just don't. You know full well about the struggle I'm going through; how the fuck is hearing you carry on about your cutting in graphic detail going to be a constructive thing for me? I don't have a miracle cure. You turn down all my advice. You make me feel...

I cut again a few days ago, after months SI-free. Not bad, just irritating. The only person who knows is my best friend. I'm dreading having to face my T.

Numb and empty.

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAARRRRRRRRRR RRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR...

Wel, I got totally sick of my old Evanescence one, and this avatar made me laugh. And god knows, somedays I can use a laugh.

These are fantastic! Thanks for sharing them, I find them really helpful. I'll remember these.

Actually ok right now. I've had a pretty good day. I feel alive, for once.

how will this situation or feeling change if i hurt myself? I know I will feel heaps calmer. what will hurting myself bring to the situation? what will it take away from the situation? Well, it will make me feel better now. It will clear my mind and calm me down enough to sleep. But tomorrow, I'll ...