bus

add... panicky...

urgy
depressed
self-loathing
restless
angry

Sounds like you've really thought through things a lot. I hope you were able to withstand the urges and remain si free.

Take care of yourself and keep self soothing.

Love ya,
ST

su trigs * * * * * I'm really afraid my friend is going to commit suicide. And there's nothing I can do about it. And I'm scared. I don't know what I would do without her. I am happy everytime I talk to her... I'm sad when I don't get to talk to her. I can talk to her about anything. She understand...

Before Questions... I'm going to try this... I hope I get throught them... how will this situation or feeling change if i hurt myself? I'll feel relief at least for the time being. Won't change the situation. Situation will still be there, but the feelings will subside. what will hurting myself brin...

i wish i could understand an emphasis the affirmations for myself... but they all seem to fall flat... seem so far from how I really am. It would be a lie to tell myself these things... and I'm not suppose to lie... so where does that leave me? sorry in a questioning and frustrated mode today. last ...

*i thought it better to delete than be in question*

Hope you start feeling better soon.

scared

Good letter to yourself. Now just keep trying to follow it!

Keep getting it out. Is it helping any?

listening to music, trying to change the "outcome" of the dream if i notice i'm in one (become very powerful, fight back, win), if i wake up or am awake i try to orient myself and tell myself that i am not in that place anymore- and i survived. having index cards written with statements i need to re...

anxious, manicky (if that's a word), sick to my stomach, hurt, sad, want to cry

What is your secret? I'm pretty sure I'm done with my marriage. Why is it a secret? Perhaps it's only been a secret from him and I, but I don't want to hurt him and I hate to quit on something I obviously wanted at some time. What are your feelings about this secret? scared. afraid. somewhat reliev...

very sad
lonely
scared

angry
playful
confused

i wish i could go to sleep
i wish i could make decisions easier
i wish my h could just leave me alone.