bus

have you taken care of your physical wounds? if not, go do that now. we'll wait.
yes
what had happened just before?
i was reading a book that my counselor had given me about childhood sexual abuse, and the abuser was female, just like mine. i felt like since it only happened once, i didn't deserve to complain or feel any type of way about it.
why did you end up hurting yourself then instead of some other time? was there an event that was the final straw? what was it?
i felt like i didnt deserve to have feelings about my sexual assault. i felt invalidated by myself.
how did the situation get to the final straw stage? trace it back through the events that led up to the last event. look for some point at which you could have made a different decision and not arrived at the final straw.

were there outside factors like drugs, alcohol, being off your meds, lack of sleep, etc? can you address those in the future? how?
i forgot my meds yesterday, but other than that, no.
what other ways of coping did you try besides self-harm? how well did they work?
i didn't try anything before using self harm
in retrospect, are there coping methods that you now realize might have helped? what were they?
name at least two things you will do to help yourself remember those coping methods if you end up in this situation again.
i will let myself feel things about my assault, and i will write about my feelings
how do you feel about the situation that led to self-harm now? is it resolved? if not, what are some steps you might take toward resolution?
it is not resolved, and it may have in fact been made worse if my mom sees the bandaid on my arm.
are you likely to be in that emotional place again? how will you recognize it when you're in that situation?
yes, when i continue reading. i will recognize it by a feeling of "fuck it" (if that makes sense)
what will you try before you resort to self-harm if you're in that situation again? list three specific things you will commit to trying.
i will try these three things:
writing in my journal
stop reading and crochet
freeze my tools for self harm