Questions to Answer After A Slip
slips are chances to learn. you figure out what stresses are still too hard for you and you can work on how you'll deal with them next time you run into them. so instead of beating yourself up, take action.
- have you taken care of your physical wounds? if not, go do that now. we'll wait.
I'm good - what had happened just before?
I was trying to work on a project and time was slipping away and I was getting seriously agitated - what were you thinking and feeling?
That i was dumb and that he was going to call me out and everyone would know that I'm not as good as they are and there was no way i was going to get this all done. hopeless. - why did you end up hurting yourself then instead of some other time? was there an event that was the final straw? what was it?
My roommate and her boyfriend left for the weekend. - how did the situation get to the final straw stage? trace it back through the events that led up to the last event. look for some point at which you could have made a different decision and not arrived at the final straw.
I've been stressing since the class started, this teacher's reputation far far preceedes him and if there had been anyone other than him that taught it, i wouldn't have taken it. I haven't been sleeping well or much. Was distracted and irritable all night, but my roommate for the first time this week, decided to sleep here. So I didn't do anything, but i woke up feeling awful and more stressed over having not done anything the night before and it just built up too much. I was nearing a panic attack over the thought of going to school and i just, couldn't do it. - were there outside factors like drugs, alsohol, being off your meds, lack of sleep, etc? can you address those in the future? how?
There's always a lack of sleep, but as long as i have to be at 730 classes and opening at my job at 8, that's just going to be a fact of life. I've always had problems with sleep. - what other ways of coping did you try besides self-harm? how well did they work?
I tried using the board and the coping list and the distraction list and the nest and place and nothing was really helping. it got me through last night, but there wasn't anything new this morning really and I just, there's not much you can do when there's two people sitting about five feet from you. - in retrospect, are there coping methods that you now realize might have helped? what were they?
I should have left. Gone for a drive. Gone to the art store, something that would have gotten me out of the house and away from things that could hurt me. - name at least two things you will do to help yourself remember those coping methods if you end up in this situation again.
Put my car keys where i can see them and not buried under papers/journals/etc
Take out paint brushes to remind myself there's other things to do - how do you feel about the situation that led to self-harm now? is it resolved? if not, what are some steps you might take toward resolution?
Yeah it's resolved, I talked it out with some people and the best thing for me to do is just stop going to that class and take the F until I'm ready to face that kind of criticism. - are you likely to be in that emotional place again? how will you recognize it when you're in that situation?
Very likely. Got another two years roughly of school. I'll recognize it when I'm there, but i'm not sure if once i hit that point i can think logically - what will you try before you resort to self-harm if you're in that situation again? list three specific things you will commit to trying.
-leaving the room, new scenery
-painting
- going to a store
About Opportunities to SI
Opportunity to Self-Harm seems to be a common theme. Think about why opportunities are important to slips and learn why opportunity is important to you.
- What made that opportunity more appealing than any other?
My roommate and her bf (who are stessors in and of themselves) were finally leaving - Did you make an opportunity or was it there for the taking?
There for the taking - What would you have done if there was no opportunity, how would you have handled your urge?
i would have made an opportunity. They would have gone to make food or something and i would have told them i was taking a shower - If there had been no opportunity would your urge to self-harm have increased or decreased?
increased. - What consitutes opportunity for you? Being alone? having new tools? waiting for the right feeling?
Being alone helps. Mostly it's reaching the point where i can't think about much else and i just want. - If your opportunties were taken away, how would you feel?
frantic. lost. edgy, antsy, nothing pleasant.