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This isn't about si but i was thinking about si and then went and gambled some money and it was really hard to stop and walk away. Posting on my phone so i'm going to submit part of it then edit my post so i don't accidentally lose the whole thing. I generally gamble occasionally and don't have a pr...

Dr m, when i say i'm not coping with anything, why wouldn't you ask more questions? I know i didn't want to talk but if you'd asked i would have had somewhere to start. I feel so scared and alone.

hi. i think it's a good thing to answer the q's for a short delay to si or a way of understanding your feelings, and that benefit is not removed if you do end up si-ing. i hope you don't delete your post. the guilt and sadness sounds intense and overwhelming. even if talking to other people is not a...

Questions to Answer After A Slip slips are chances to learn. you figure out what stresses are still too hard for you and you can work on how you'll deal with them next time you run into them. so instead of beating yourself up, take action. have you taken care of your physical wounds? if not, go do ...

I'm sorry you have to fake being ok. In my experience si and faking being ok were almot the same - i was trying not to burden other ppl and avoiding what seemed like the inevitable rejection or let-down when ppl were sick of trying to help me. Many ppl still helped me though, they thought the burden...

hi moon raver. how you answer the questions is up to you, but i was wondering if you could think about the question below and see if there are other things it might bring up. how did the situation get to the final straw stage? trace it back through the events that led up to the last event. look for ...

well done loki, on keeping to your positive coping skills. do you have any breathing exercises you could do? they often help me with anxiety. also, time by myself helps, i try to get a balance between being around people and being on my own.

you can get through this, it will get easier.

write down the shadow that's hiding behind the urge. look at it. ask yourself: how will this situation or feeling change if i hurt myself? i will feel better. i will express something i need to express. i will create a protection to wall off some of the darkness. what will hurting myself bring to th...

is a reply ok? i'll delete this if you don't want it here. simple is good, i'm glad you were able to answer some of the questions. it sounds like even if you were able to get some focus at first, after you si you will have trouble concentrating and things will feel worse. being afraid of yourself an...

Should I make a thread for my before/after posts like some people do instead of making a new topic each time? it's up to you. i have a thread because my posts are quite spaced out and i want to be able to look back at prev things that might've helped me from those posts. it can be easier for ppl to...

i don't know what the emotions are but it feels a bit like i'm imploding and exploding at the same time. weight on my shoulders and pressure in my stomach. going to try and do whatever calming things i can think of...

i think if you find a professional therapist who works well with you, it doesn't need to make sense what you say, they will help you deal with what you are experiencing without judgment or pushing a diagnosis.

i'm sorry this is difficult and scary.

If I do something that involves an IRL person - I'll hate me so much for bothering someone. I already hate me for considering it. Even SIing is better than that - bothering people, takin gong up their time. . . if someone you know came to you and said "i don't want to bother you but i really need t...

My first thought is: Does it even matter what I want? [/list] i think it does matter but i think maybe you value your relationship more than the relief you'd get from si. i also do things because someone else wants or expects it and i find most of the time going along with that is helpful for me (b...

not so much answering the questions as typing out how i feel and using the q's as prompts... why now? i had a good day, i am not completely alone (my sis is in bed but awake and occasionally talking to me). i am anxious about a busy day tomorrow, but i guess more anxious about early mornings - i nee...

hi loki,

i hope you are able to get to sleep soon. incense and tea sound like great ways to relax your mind and body before sleep. do you have any calming music or other sensory things that might help?

that sounds like a really difficult feeling to cope with, do you have anyone to talk to about it? could you look at trying to find a sexual abuse hotline that you can call when those thoughts and feelings come up? there's a phone and online hotline run by rainn - https://ohl.rainn.org/online/

How can I deal with these feelings more effectively next time, before the urge to SI sets in? i don't know, i never figured out what led to the urge you could use these coping methods when you're in physical pain or when you're frustrated (i would guess that not getting your prescription was frustr...

i understand those feelings.
i don't have anything helpful to say right now. hope that writing here helped

I fixed myself a salad and told myself I would keep my body healthy, if not my mind. That didn't work. you said it made you feel proud of trying - that's a postive. did it distract or delay the si? if it helps at all, that's good. what will you try before you resort to self-harm if you're in that s...