bus

I'm lying

Before You Self-Harm write down the shadow that's hiding behind the urge. look at it. ask yourself: how will this situation or feeling change if i hurt myself? I will get relief, at least momentarily. I will feel like I have adequately punished myself for how badly I've screwed up. what will hurtin...

thank you very much!

Hi there, I can't remember if this is the right place to put this request. I would like my old place locked as its been 2 or 3 years since I last used it. I'd like to start a new one. Please feel free to move this request if it should go somewhere else. I am leaving the link in my sig so it will be ...

Nothing makes me happy. Nothing makes any of this okay. Nothing makes me okay. Maybe there will always just be nothing. And I don't think I can live with nothing for the rest of my life.

out of control

Considering the circumstances, considering my deteriorating emotional state, I did the best that I could to tell you to leave me alone. You changed the state of the safe space I thought that I had and then you refused to get out of it despite all of my signals that that was exactly what you should d...

I don't know if I want help for my su feelings, because as badly as I want to be whole and healed, every help that anyone has ever promised has always ended with me here again.

Why would you feel privileged to be working with me? I want to ask what you mean by that but that would be attention seeking... right?

Tuesday night I remembered something from years ago that I didn't even know that I forgot. It was terrifying, I'm reliving it, and more than anything I want to unremember it, but it doesn't seem to work like that. I'm scared.

When I told you I was okay, that was a lie. I am not okay. And you can't be here for me and I know that but it doesn't make it suck any less. I just want you here, I want you hugging me, telling me it will all be okay. But it's just not. I miss you and I hope you really believed me when I told you I...

I really really really miss you.

Responses welcome :) Before: how will this situation or feeling change if i hurt myself? I will feel grounded. It will get rid of the edge. what will hurting myself bring to the situation? what will it take away from the situation? It will bring relief and distraction from the memories I am reliving...

I'm proud of myself for telling B about my mental health struggles. And I'm happy that she didn't run away, yet.

I feel overwhelmed and terrified of what I've gotten myself into

I'm going to;
- tell my t everything today
-journal
-workout

I'm so sorry I'm not around. I've tried and tried; no one will let me talk to you. I'm so sorry for everything we went through, I'm sorry I didn't have a better reason for not letting you die (I'm even sorrier that I don't think there was one...), I'm sorry you don't have access to the help that I h...

I'm proud of myself for going to 2 therapy appointments this week

I took was kind to myself by letting myself nap instead of SIing to deal with my feelings.

Thanks for leading me on for a whole night and then leaving me for someone else in the 2 minutes it took me to check my phone. I wasn't expecting a relationship but damn, have some respect.

I feel stressed overwhelmed and like a failure.

I am going to read over all of my test materials and try to get a good night's sleep. Things will look better in the morning.